What Does Happiness Feel Like?

Written By Tawni Bennett

“I have a fear of happiness”

I tell my therapist, tears in my eyes, because I have this constant fear of “the other shoe dropping.” I fear getting excited over the positives because life has taught me that I will find myself disappointed, again.

She asks me “What does happiness look like to you?”

I conjure images of people smiling and laughing. The typical ad for the good life.

“Do you think that type of happiness is sustainable?” no.

“It is not sustainable to be that image of happy all of the time. If someone is smiling all of the time, most likely they are suppressing emotions, suppressing their authentic self. So let’s rethink what happiness means…”

What are 3 words that feel like happiness to you?

My three words

  • For me, the word “calm” denotes a state of tranquility that enhances the feelings of happiness. When I am calm, I have the capacity to appreciate life’s positive aspects more fully, reducing stress and allowing joy to flourish.

    This state fosters mindfulness and gratitude.

  • For me, the word “stable” signifies consistency and reliability, which are essential for emotional well-being. When we experience stability in various aspects of life, we are better equipped to navigate challenges and maintain a positive outlook.

  • For me, the word “secure” refers to a state of safety and protection, both physically and emotionally. When I feel secure in my environment and relationships, I am more likely to experience deeper joy and fulfillment, and I can fully engage with life and pursue my passions without fear.

These 3 words have since become one of my mantras. When I am feeling overwhelmed and I feel fear creeping in, I try to regain mindfulness by taking deep breaths from my diaphragm and repeat “calm, stable, secure” until I start to feel it.

Mindfulness refers to the practice of being fully present and aware of one’s thoughts, feelings, and surroundings without judgement. In the context of happiness, mindfulness enhances the capacity to appreciate the present moment, allowing us to savor joyful experiences as they occur. By fostering a deeper connection to the here and now, mindfulness reduces stress and anxiety, creating space for what happiness means to you.

I encourage you to take a moment to connect with what happiness feels like to you.

Every Body is Unique

… find your unique feeling of happiness.

Book recommendations that have helped me connect to happiness:

  • I recommend her entire series, including The Magic. This book is a gratitude workbook, helping you practice mindfulness and being grateful of what you have in your life right now.

  • While the book focuses on tidying up our physical surroundings, you will be surprised how you see it transform your relationship to yourself and others.

  • Through reading this book, I have discovered how our current system is designed for extroverts but how my qualities of being quiet and observatory can be a powerful tool that I can share with others.

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Tawni Bennett